On finding landlords

So, as of late, the plan has been to move to DC. Charina and I both really need to get out of St. Mary's. There's nothing for either of us here, and we fear that if we stay too long, we will be bogged down and stuck. This, now being said, means we need to find an apartment, which is easier said than done. We've poured through craig's list and have found a few places and emailed a few potential landlords only to discover every scam that could possibly exist in the DC area. Here are a few really good examples of when you know you're being scammed...

1) Your landlord is a wonderful soul who has decided to hop a plane to West Africa to do missionary work for their church...
"We have left the Washington, DC and we are currently in West Africa for our missionary call. Before we left the Washington, DC for West Africa, we look for a reputable agent that will take a very good care of th e house while we are away but could not found any so we left with the house keys and document when leaving. If you will be the right tenant to our house, we will get the keys and documents of the house sent to you via courier services as soon as all terms are settled. I will be online through out to get back to you as soon as you are able to get back to me. I would want to know how soon you would want to move in as I will be taking a 1 month upfront payment for the house including all the utilities there."

2) Your landlord has hit petroleum in West Africa and moved out to manage it all. Of course, he also could not find anyone suitable to hold his keys...
"We have left the Washington, DC and we are currently in West Africa for our missionary call. Before we left the Washington, DC for West Africa, we look for a reputable agent that will take a very good care of th e house while we are away but could not found any so we left with the house keys and document when leaving. If you will be the right tenant to our house, we will get the keys and documents of the house sent to you via courier services as soon as all terms are settled. I will be online through out to get back to you as soon as you are able to get back to me. I would want to know how soon you would want to move in as I will be taking a 1 month upfront payment for the house including all the utilities there. I am asking for $900 and I believe we should be able to help ourselves. I am accepting $900 because I want you to take a very good care of the house while I am away."
** This one wanted me to believe he built his own house... his house was the center ROW house... Why would you build the center row house on your own? That's a stupid place to start building..

3) Your landlord is an engineer stationed in the UK, where it's a little more expensive...
"Thanks for taking the time to look at my property.My name is Mary Ford,I'm 48 years old,I'm a construction engineer and I'm the owner of this condo(2 Bedrooms/2 Baths, 1100 square footage) .I lived in this beautiful condo for over 5 years,loved every day of it.It's located at :17th St NW & T St NW, Washington, DC 20009.
I've moved to United Kingdom with my job and decided to rent it because the rent is is very expensive here.The price is so low because I'm here and is very hard to find a tenant.I can rent you the apt for max. 5 years .
I really want to find a good and responsible tenant for it, and I hope that you can send me some personal and financial information about yourself."
**I'm sure my personal and financial information would be wonderful. However, I will decline from this offer because you don't sound legit at all. Why is it that there are so many people willing to rent out their humble abodes, but don't seem to have a single trustworthy friend to hold their keys so we can see the place? How gangsta' is DC?

4) Landlords can be overbearing... even when the only question asked was "can I get the physical address so I can check the place out?"...
"Thank you again for your reply. If you are ready to proceed with
this transaction I must tell you how this service works and what we
need to do.You have to deposit to the RENT service the first month of rent-$1100
and a security deposit of $1100, so they can proceed with the shipping
of the keys and the contract. Like I said, I will pay for two days
delivery so you'll receive the Keys and the contract signed by me
right away. I will explain you step by step how this service work."
**After depositing our rent and security deposit, they would send us the keys and signed contract... Oh hell no! All I wanted was the physical address... I didn't want a thirty minute explanation as to how paying the rent should happen. By the way, they explained this to us several different times in the email, with bullets and numbering systems.

Ok, obviously these scams have worked on someone. If they didn't there wouldn't be so many out there. I can see the allure they would have on a kid my age, looking for their first place and trying to get the best possible deal. But as a renter, owner, leaser of a property, you have the right to see it before you put any money on the table. You have the right to demand some proof of ownership on the supposed owner's part. You have a right to ask for information regarding utilities, house structure and all of that. If you don't ask, you're going to get scammed. Thankfully, my mother is very protective. While she understands why I want to move out, she still is shadowing everything. Her being a Realtor has made a huge impact on the way I see housing and I know more in depth questions. But even on a basic level.. anyone telling you you cannot see a house because they are in West Africa with the only set of keys... NO. Just say NO!

Fuck people. Seriously. I say we go pick out a nice box this weekend and we'll live in that. Because I cannot take anymore of this stupid fuckery. And just think, we can live in whatever neighborhood we want to.

Be Safe...

If you could move anywhere in the world, what are some of the places that would make your list?


The topic of moving has come up quite frequently between Cha and I. I think that we need a new place to hang our hat and call home. Lately, DC has become the epicenter of discussion. I'd love to live there. Compared to St. Mary's County, there is soooo much to do, and never seems to be a dull moment unless you decide you want it to bed. I think I'd love to move to a bigger city. My list would have to include DC, London, Rammstein, New York and maybe even Chicago. That would be awesome!


I think besides DC, I would have go with London or possibly New Orleans. I have always had an obsession with England, and I've always always wanted to live there. I've even joked about how if I were ever to go I would have to forced to go home. Now with New Orleans, I went on vacation there right before Hurricane Katrina, and I realize it probably isn't going to be the same city that I feel in love with. But I still have hope that it will. I mean I just really felt comfortable there, which for an awkward kid like me is a hard feeling to come by.